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Warning: the article below is satirical, and not meant to be taken seriously.
Reading Football Club are not doing very well. When the club is not doing well, the #ReadingFC hashtag is not a friendly place to visit.
There are many stables full of high horses, a generational war and false accusations being thrown around so often that if we were to take part in a university drinking game, every Reading fan would be in the hospital having their stomach pumped.
So Tweets of the Week is going to be a little different this time. I'm not going to provide you with the 'best tweets from the past week' as I usually claim to do. No, sir (or madam), I am going to provide you with an 'Overreact-o-meter', graded from 1–5 (highest).
I realise that by doing this, I too am jumping on one of those high horses and making people aware of the fact that my opinion is the only one that counts. And that's because it is. So now you know. Ha.
It is likely you will be offended or unimpressed, but like the #ReadingFC hashtag, I DGAF.
Trigger warning: ridicule below. And bad language. And opinion.
This guy gets a 5.
3 wins 16 games 17th 8 points above relegation. Argue with that #mcdermotts #bumboys #readingfc
— Big Whack (@BoxingWatson) March 21, 2016
There's some absolute cunts on #readingfc timeline most know fuck all and have no right to question an opinion of a ST of 26 years
— Big Whack (@BoxingWatson) March 21, 2016
That'll be because he's OUT OF FORM. 3.
EC 2015/16: Top 3 Chances Created
— Fresh Championship (@EN_Championship) March 20, 2016
1) Craig Conway - 101
2) Alan Judge - 95
3) Oliver Norwood - 92#rovers #brentfordfc #readingfc
Yet we start him on the bench #readingfc https://t.co/iTzZrAXRvk
— • (@WillCorbishley) March 20, 2016
Do I really have to say it? I'll say it. ZINGAREVICH. 4.
Not that many years ago Saints finished 2nd to #readingfc. They are now 4 points from a Champ Lge place. And we're......Change needed fast!
— David Luker (@DavidELuker) March 20, 2016
He has a point, but Warnock's the definition of asshole. Look it up. 3.
Can those still blaming it on everything but BM explain why Warnock is doing a better job having inherited a much bigger mess? #readingfc
— Andy Charman (@AndyRFCCharman) March 20, 2016
"Corpse." 2.
Sizing up the best bits of the corpse that is our playing staff this season methinks #readingfc https://t.co/OyzwCchKG7
— Tom Roberts (@TomR1213) March 20, 2016
Him again. 5.
There's some real bellends on #readingfc timeline, Nigel Pearson would have been ideal instead we get a bald cunt who ain't got a clue
— Big Whack (@BoxingWatson) March 20, 2016
The same Blackman who hasn't scored since he joined Derby, who are woefully out of form? 1.
I bet @nblackman89 is gutted with all the stick #readingfc fans give him being 19 pts ahead of us with prospect of EPL football next year
— Lee Wyeth (@leewyeth) March 20, 2016
4 points from play-offs and falling fast. 4.
@JLees14 Just 4 points off the play offs. The change has been a #readingfc disaster as SDR said from day one. #YesMan gone in 12 & relegated
— Sir Dodger Royal (@SirDodgerRoyal) March 19, 2016
Going backwards under three different managers. Definitely the manager's problem. 1.
@kempy26783 A lot of people (myself included) really like McDermott the man, but he is not the manager #readingfc need. Going backwards
— Peter West (@peterfwest) March 19, 2016
Simple fix, really. 2.
If I was manager… I haven't named potential new players as that's the scouting team's job #readingfc pic.twitter.com/dPnO1OxgBA
— Will (@Quinniesta) March 19, 2016
RELEGATION BECKONS, BOYS. 4.
Slowly creeping into a relegation battle for use #readingfc
— padz (@padzRfc) March 19, 2016
"Great" squad? I think not, pal. 1.
17th in championship with great squad & big wage bill yay for us @ReadingFC #readingfc
— Johnny Hunt (@Huntyroyal) March 19, 2016
Oh look, emojis. Witty. 3.
#readingfc pic.twitter.com/RbtnZzUEsl
— IAN KIRKPATRICK (@gutbuck) March 19, 2016
Disagree? You ain't no real fan, fam. 5.
Your typical #readingfc. Happy to see gold where there's shit and anyone who disagrees is not a real fan. https://t.co/ZFC6lCIBW6
— William (@WilliamM1871) March 19, 2016
All change. Because that worked well in the summer. 3.
The owners will soon start looking at the people internally who recommended McDermott. All change please.#readingfc pic.twitter.com/GwCkW7Bzgi
— Jonathan Richards (@JR_1871) March 19, 2016
I've had enough now. I can't handle it. I'm at the end of my tether.At the end of the day, there's more to life than football.
There is no overreaction here, just d'awwwwwww.
My son! Mother and baby doing great - what a whirlwind day, he nearly arrived in the car. ❤️ pic.twitter.com/oMtVCATugO
— Charles Watts (@charles_watts) March 19, 2016
Thanks for all the kind messages, just been reading them all. Much appreciated. pic.twitter.com/XCVH6PQ19w
— Charles Watts (@charles_watts) March 20, 2016
If you've not had enough overreactions, you can always head to the #ReadingFC hashtag. Or, even better, #McDermottOut. I dared not tread there for too long. Scary.
Oh, and if you're outraged at what I've published here today and want to defend your #McDermottOut opinion, email thetilehurstend@gmail.com
If you want someone to hate on, head to @RoyalHoops.